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Journal in English

1. A Card I Bought in Canada(05/21)
2. The First Time as a Teacher(04/07)
3. My dog(03/23)

A Card I Bought in Canada

Juka and I bought a card for our friend when we
were in Canada. Because she was leaving,
we planed to hand a card to her. The card looked
pretty cool, by the way.
We wrote massages for her and asked the homestay
mother to write a massage for her.
She saw the card and said that I shouldn't have
used this card.

The card said like this.

Outside:
In love they are remembered and in memory they live.

Inside:
Our thoughts are with you, in deepest sympathy.


The host mother told me that it was used for
the dead. She said, "Don't use it".

Juka and I were disapointed about that.
Eventhough the hostmother told us not to use
the card, we decided to give it to the friend.
We talked to her about the card, and we laughed.
She looked happy.



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The First Time as a Teacher

I had a special day today. Now, I am a teacher in
a private school. It's called "Juku" in Japan, by
the way. I teach mainly English and Math.
I usually teach two or three students at the same
time. They study totally different things,
for example, English, Math and Japanese. They are
also in different grades. So, I'm kind of tutoring
three kids at the same time.

It was really difficult for me.
I hope to get used to it.

By the way, It's not what I do for a living.
It 's sort of a part time job, so I still need to
get a job. I have to think about that.



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My dog

My dog was dead. She was almost 17 years old.

She was too weak to eat, stand, walk, probably hear
or see when I came back from Canada. I had started
to take care of my dog, so she got better.
I'd looked after my dog for about 2 months.

Three days before she died, she couldn't eat
anything, even sweet jelly. I think she had really
hard time. Maybe she was in pain. Maybe she was
scared. I was wondering if I should let her die,
I mean, mercy killing; euthanasia. But I couldn't
decide.

In the morning, I brought her outside. She suddenly
started to pee while I was holding her. She had
never done like that, so I thought it was the time.
She was just breathing, only breathing. A very long
interval of breath. I felt the beating of her heart.
It was weaker and weaker...

While I was taking care of her, I sometimes felt
irritated. I'm really sorry about it. She had 3 days
without any food. She might want to die.
It's killing me.
I wish I could understand her, but I know no one
could do that.

No one knows if she was happy, but I definitely
believe that she was.
I believe that the thing I believe that she was happy
makes her happy.

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